Hummingbird_Healing_Center

FRIENDSHIP

I loath the fact that I am alone. I go to the store alone. I go to movies alone. I eat in restaurants alone. I sleep alone and more depressing, I wake up alone to another day of being by myself. I was bemoaning this condition to my friend, Chuck, who said to me he wished that he were alone. Being alone to him meant having hope.

I asked for an explanation. He related that had no time for himself. He was always surrounded by someone who wanted something from him; intruders into his reveries who made noise and interrupted his train of thought; others who demanded his services; others that required things of him that he did begrudgingly. He wanted to make choices again – the kind of choices you can only make when you are alone; choices that gave him pleasure; even doing little things for others. He felt hopeless.

Well, I certainly could understand the freedom in being responsible for only myself. Choosing to do certain activities or going at my own leisure to places I appreciated; and not having to ask permission or beg for company from someone who didn’t share my enthusiasm or interests. All of that lifestyle was second nature to me and Chuck could not understand how I didn’t appreciate it more.

It’s the old story of curly-haired girls wanting straight hair and straight-haired girls wanting curls. Is it just human nature to not appreciate what you have and want what you do not have? Is there such an animal as having the best of both worlds?

Here’s another catch phrase: finding the “happy medium.” And this doesn’t mean a contented psychic reader. This means living in the best of both worlds – that of being a solitary entity and that of being part of a committed unit.

Friendship. A friend is more than just an acquaintance. It is a commitment of the highest caliber. A friend is one that you laugh with, enjoy their smiles, listen to their tales of woe, give advice, take advice, hug with abandon, make love with your heart, your eyes, your words, your actions – not necessarily with your bodies. Or, use your bodies to give each other exquisite pleasure – if you choose to do so, without owning one another or without expectation. That’s being alone and yet being a friend and sharing in that hopeful flow of the give and take of life.

posted by Shirley @ Thursday, September 02, 2010